


I'm not your mistake and you're not mine

by shadowkatja



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Break Up, M/M, Verstappen's wedding, beecause it's part of life, but I still need representation of breakups, mentioned Charles, ok I know that it's a cliche
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-06-26
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:21:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24928357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadowkatja/pseuds/shadowkatja
Summary: a new part of your life is going to start and you mustn’t do it with all this mess
Relationships: Daniel Ricciardo/Max Verstappen
Comments: 2
Kudos: 23





	I'm not your mistake and you're not mine

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to my dear [Evitolla](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evitolla/) who helped me a lot with the emotional part of this work even if she is out of our fandom.  
> As usual, it's just fanfiction and has no connection with real drivers.

The small room smells oiled wood panels, myrrh, and deep scent of frankincense. It’s quite dark. There is just one narrow stained-glass window with blood-red roses, tall enough to let in the light so Daniel has got a clear view of Max who is pacing without any word.

They are in Saint Charles Church where Max Verstappen’s wedding is taking place. 

Max with his gorgeous black suit, shined shoes, blinding white shirt, and styled hair looks officially and absolutely stunning. Dan with his pure love for casual style always had a weakness to Max in a suit. 

Dan is ready to swear that Max wants to escape more than anything. Brave Max Verstappen who is never at a loss for words, who drives a car at a speed of three hundred kilometres per hour is nervous and shy because of his wedding. What a joke.

Dan jumps off a table where he has been sitting last few minutes and stands on his way.

‘Max, stop it. Now you need to pull yourself together,’ Daniel gives a quick look to his watch, ‘the ceremony starts in ten minutes’.

‘What if everything is a mistake?’ Max makes a move with his hand around the room.

‘What if not? Don't be ridiculous, you love her, she loves you. What’s wrong?’

‘But I love you as well and I’m lost. I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to make a decision,’ he almost shouts.

Daniel knows it well. He knew that last night when he saw red Max’s eyes after his usual post-sex shower. He knew that long ago when he understood that it wasn’t just one-night stand but Max didn’t hurry to break up with Dilara. So here they are. But Dan is sure what he should do as an older and more responsible person.

‘You won’t leave her,’ Dan can guarantee it, ‘It’s not a question, Max’.

‘You’re right. I won’t’.

Daniel comes closer and pushes Max’s shoulders slightly to refocus his attention from the wall behind to him.

‘Everything will be ok, I promise’.

‘And we?’

‘And we,’ Dan fixes Max’s bowtie last time and shakes off an invisible speck of dust from his collar.

‘But how?’ Max grabs his arm with a pleading look. Daniel would like to shut up but he can't.

‘Nohow,’ he smiles, ‘It’s time to go ahead. We spent a brilliant time together. Full of fun and sort of love. It wasn’t a mistake. You weren’t my mistake, I wasn’t yours. Maybe you don’t feel it now. Maybe you need time to accept. But a new part of your life is going to start and you mustn’t do it with all this mess’. 

Dan knows that he hurts him a lot. All this conversation is unbearable. For Max, mainly. Daniel himself had few months to prepared. He's been ready since Max said that he is getting married and wants Dan to be the best man. 

But it offends him too. He sees Max's full lips and this mole that he touches with his mouth and fingers so many times. He feels the smell of Max's perfume that he gifted him last Christmas. Lots of flashbacks run through his memory in seconds.

No one has the right to say that it's easy for Daniel and he feels anything. No one. He might look relax. He might accept it. However, he still might close the eyes and imagine a sunny morning in a bed with warm naked Max, slow kisses, lazy sex, stupid jokes. He loved it.

Perhaps he doesn’t choose the right time to say it out loud. But he needs closure.

‘I need to make peace with the fact that it's over, right?’ Max looks like he is dead inside. He winces as if he has a headache and complains, ‘the damn incenses’.

Dan also feels that strange sense that always precedes the headache. It's not a surprise. He hates these damn incenses and prefers to avoid churches all his entire adult life. He just couldn't say 'no' to Max. Although it would be a better decision than stay here and ruin their relationship even if he knows that he does what he has to do.

‘I’m really sorry’.

Their faces are so close that one false move will make them kiss. Max’s breath is felt on the skin, the throat is compressed, Dan wants to howl and scream, whether from the injustice of this world, or the pressing pain somewhere behind the sternum. All he can think about is how much he wants this to end. Whether a hurricane wipes this place off the face of the Earth, or a meteor falls on the planet and this damned Church does not matter. Nothing matters anymore. Just one quick kiss last time. But Max exhales forcefully, pulls away, and lets go of his hands.

‘You don’t have to,’ Max shakes his head, his voice is hoarse as if he has been silent for a long time and now can speak again. Well, it's not far from the truth. ‘You are absolutely right.’

Daniel sees an abyss covering in ice in Max’s eyes. And no matter how much he wants to turn the time back and never have this conversation happens, his inner sense of justice made him say all of these hurting words. He is sure that Max will understand and forgive him in time. Even if Dan is confident that he does everything right and doesn’t see a thing for which he must be forgiven.

They just need time to become good mates back. Both of them.

Another quick look at the watch.

‘We should go’.

***

‘I’m a dead drunk,’ Dans sits on the main stairs leaning against the balustrade with his phone near the ear. How nice that the Verstappens booked the entire hotel for their small private ceremony so nobody can see Daniel with his dirty trousers and shirt doused with wine. Max would have been made a joke about his appearance, his unsuccessful attempts to drown sadness in wine. But he is alone here. There is nobody to help him. Unless this one.

‘Wasn’t easy, hah?’

He can't find any logical reasons why he called this number.  It was just an impulse. He can’t be left alone trapped in his head.  And he knows that he wouldn't be blamed.

‘Can you get me out of there?’

‘I’ll be in fifteen minutes,’ phone answered with Charles’ voice after a short pause. 


End file.
